by AnnSheybani | Oct 3, 2014 | Alcoholic rules, all or nothing, Authenticity, Boundaries, Codependency, confrontation, criticism, dealing with criticism, growing up, Honesty, husband, Life, narcissism, parenting, passive aggressive, people pleasing, personality disorder, rage, The Adult Children of Alcoholics Syndrome, Walt Hampton
Dear Mimi, Thank you for your comment on this Youtube video. You claim that Walt is a 100% narcissist. The thing I’ve noticed about defensiveness, which is what your criticism stirred, is that it always kicks in when I detect an element of truth in what’s...
by AnnSheybani | Sep 16, 2014 | adventure, Alcoholic rules, expectations, goals, Ireland, Life, Planning, process, route finding, tenacity, The Adult Children of Alcoholics Syndrome, Writing
I started working on a blog this morning while overlooking the pasture. Halfway in, I realized I’d written the very same piece a year ago. Which reminded me of something I once read: photographers have only one picture, writers have only one story. Have you...
by AnnSheybani | Jun 29, 2014 | Alcoholic rules, Codependency, confrontation, growing up, Life, limiting beliefs, people pleasing, rage, The Adult Children of Alcoholics Syndrome
As I’ve mentioned about a thousand times before, I grew up in an alcoholic household. My dad was a former farm boy from rural North Dakota who hated his job as an engineer at Pratt & Whitney, or, as we used to call it at home, Pratt & Whiskey. Now, I’ve...
by AnnSheybani | Apr 6, 2014 | Alcoholic rules, books, coaching, expectations, Honesty, Life, limiting beliefs, manipulation, rage, self-sabotage, Shift The World, Steve Chandler, The Adult Children of Alcoholics Syndrome
My mom was the queen of expectations. Despite being very helpful to me, particularly when my kids were young, her acts of service always came with an unspoken price tag. Our relationship suffered because she expected me to do whatever she ‘expected’ of me...
by AnnSheybani | Dec 30, 2013 | Alcoholic rules, Alcoholism, Authenticity, Codependency, Codependent No More, Honesty, Intimacy, Life, rage, The Adult Children of Alcoholics Syndrome
I received a comment from a lovely woman last week, which inspired this blog. …I am plodding on, getting out there, striving! LOL. Still with the same negative, self pitying man, who I live with like brother and sis now! Unfortunately I share a bed with him, but...
by AnnSheybani | Aug 25, 2013 | 10 Stupid Things WomenDo to Mess Up Their Lives, Alcoholic rules, Alcoholism, Anne Lamott, attachment, books, Boundaries, Brene Brown, coaching, Codependency, connection, Daring Greatly, Dr. Laura Schlessinger, Emotional Unavailability, extreem dependency, Fearless Living, grace, guilt, Honesty, identity, Intimacy, limiting beliefs, Lit, love, Mary Karr, mistakes, nice girl complex, people pleasing, perfectionism, Reading, Rhonda Britten, role model, Saying no, Self love, Sociopathology, The Adult Children of Alcoholics Syndrome, The Gifts of Imperfection, The Sociopath Next Door, Traveling Mercies, vulnerability
If I were to teach a course about overcoming the emotional damage and the misconceptions picked up from alcoholic parents, this would be the semester’s assigned reading. You’ll see me quote from these books from time to time, and I often send them to my...
