by AnnSheybani | Oct 3, 2014 | Alcoholic rules, all or nothing, Authenticity, Boundaries, Codependency, confrontation, criticism, dealing with criticism, growing up, Honesty, husband, Life, narcissism, parenting, passive aggressive, people pleasing, personality disorder, rage, The Adult Children of Alcoholics Syndrome, Walt Hampton
Dear Mimi, Thank you for your comment on this Youtube video. You claim that Walt is a 100% narcissist. The thing I’ve noticed about defensiveness, which is what your criticism stirred, is that it always kicks in when I detect an element of truth in what’s...
by AnnSheybani | Aug 18, 2014 | assertiveness, Authenticity, coaching, Confidence, confrontation, Courage, expectations, Life, limiting beliefs, misinterpretation, people pleasing, risk, Self-Esteem, self-sabotage
I have a coaching client named Bill. No surprises here, Bill’s a people-pleaser, a real nice guy. You’d love him. (He’s single now, so if anybody out there is looking for a nice guy, let me know.) Once upon a time, Bill was working as an accountant at a mid-sized...
by AnnSheybani | Jul 13, 2014 | assertiveness, Authenticity, Codependency, Confidence, confrontation, connection, Courage, Honesty, Life, manipulation, nice girl complex, passive aggressive, people pleasing, Rescue, risk, Saying no, Self-acceptance, Self-Esteem
Somebody asked me the other day what I mean when I say, “I teach women how to cut the nice girl crap.” It dawns on me, now, that I need to be more specific because ignorant certain people don’t understand the expression “nice girl,” or...
by AnnSheybani | Jun 29, 2014 | Alcoholic rules, Codependency, confrontation, growing up, Life, limiting beliefs, people pleasing, rage, The Adult Children of Alcoholics Syndrome
As I’ve mentioned about a thousand times before, I grew up in an alcoholic household. My dad was a former farm boy from rural North Dakota who hated his job as an engineer at Pratt & Whitney, or, as we used to call it at home, Pratt & Whiskey. Now, I’ve...
by AnnSheybani | Jun 23, 2014 | Authenticity, confrontation, connection, criticism, Honesty, kindness, Life, manipulation, nice girl complex, people pleasing
Nice girls believe that if they’re super sweet, and agreeable, and helpful, and they never argue or complain, and they take one for the team, and they go the extra mile, and they volunteer to do the job no one else wants to do, and they keep quiet, and they don’t make...
by AnnSheybani | Jun 9, 2014 | choosing a mate, coaching, Codependency, confrontation, Courage, dating, extreem dependency, identity, infidelity, Life, love, mistakes, nice girl complex, people pleasing, risk, Self love, Self-Esteem, voice, vulnerability
Walt and I are giving a talk one evening when I meet a woman who is interested in exploring a coaching relationship. She’s impressed by the way Walt and I interact as a couple, our obvious love and respect for one another, and she wants “a look under the hood” so she...