Know that problem you just can’t seem to face? Mmmm-hmmm, that’s the one. That dead end job, or limping marriage, or troubled kid, or that fill in-the-blank.
What do you think it’s costing you to keep it under wraps, to ignore it in the hopes that it will magically solve itself?
What might life be like if you dealt with it, so you could make it through to the other side?
I once worked for a chemical manufacturer in Waterbury, CT. The president of the company—a hyperactive trust fund Tommy who’d inherited the role from his stodgy father—was on a self-help kick and wanted to similarly inspire his many employees.
During the annual meeting, he mounted the dais in his track suit and proclaimed that each of us, senior scientist right down to humble mail clerk, would be required to attend The Phoenix Seminar, a 3-day video course led by the guru Brian Tracy. By doing so, we would “unlock our potential, take charge of our lives, and release our breaks,” the sound of which scared the ever-loving shit out of me.
The problem was, I knew that I was desperately unhappy. More important, I was completely unprepared to admit that fact. To myself or anybody else.
I was living in a state of Limbo, that region on the border of heaven and hell, and I didn’t want anybody stopping over unannounced with a flashlight.
Shine a beam in my closets, and I could no longer pretend to be ignorant. I’d actually have to do something about it, like hang my shit up and shovel the mess out.
When my turn to sit through the class rolled around, I demurred. I made excuses. I explained to my supervisor that, what with my myriad of responsibilities involving the nickel plating of some very important circuit boards, I would have no time, no time at all, to participate.
My protestations fell on deaf ears.
So I went, and sure enough I came nose to nose with the pink elephant that resided in my psychic living room: I wanted out of my marriage. Which was pretty inconvenient. Because there were just too many steps to figure out, way too much pain to contemplate.
But, a funny thing happens when you get a foot like that wedged in your door.
Try as you might, you can no longer shut out that stuff you’d like to avoid. And even though you’d rather not dwell on the source of your anxiety (or depression)—because, after all, what the fuck are you supposed to do about it—your mind sets to work chipping away at it. Your subconscious starts giving you clues. And before you know it, you’ve got, not a runaway train to hell, but a problem solved. And absolutely EVERYTHING opens up.
I think about all the years I wasted hiding from the truth: What I needed; how I really felt. Spilt milk, I suppose.
Then I think about all the years and sadness and pain and inaction I saved because I started the reckoning process with that dreaded 3-day video course. Because I really, really love where I am now.
I recognize the same Limbo-hold on folks during our Breakthrough Sessions. I can tell if their door has been recently cracked, or if there’s about to be a full-on Marine Corps breach. Sometimes the topics discussed only hint at that unbearable problem they can’t yet face. Sometimes they come prepared to draw out an action plan.
Regardless, it takes fucking guts to face that light.
You are not wrong in fearing that insight is the beginning of the end.
But, let’s think about what’s at stake, here:
- Your life
- Your world
- Your sense of tranquility
- Your adventures
- Your voice
- Your freedom
- Your career
- Your talents and gifts
You.
The day of reckoning is here.
