Like a lot of overachievers, I hold myself to impossible standards. It’s bought me a lot in life: it’s also created gratuitous stress.
This morning, even before my eyes snapped open, I began rehashing all the things I’d done wrong the day before, what I should have done differently, and how, thanks to my complete lack of discipline, I’ll never, ever, ever get any traction. I’ll weigh 400 pounds. And spend my days farting around on the couch. And I’ll start 56 more projects and leave them all undone. You know. Really positive, congratulatory words of self-encouragement.
I heard Jane Fonda talk about the same insidious proclivity in a Ted Talk. During her late 40’s, she’d worried about the fact that the first six thoughts of her day were all negative. Her father had been a depressive, so she could see where she was headed. (BTW. If you haven’t read her book My Life So Far, you really ought to. She’s someone who knows what it is to lose her self to men.)
The other day, my friend Allyson Griles-Monson posted this on Facebook. It made me want to clutch my chest.
Finish each day and be done with it. You have done what you could. Some blunders and absurdities no doubt crept in; forget them as soon as you can. Tomorrow is a new day. You shall begin it serenely and with too high a spirit to be encumbered with your old nonsense.
What a wonderful reminder that we all need to cut ourselves (especially you know who) a major dose of slack.
And then, because I’m totally dense, and I insist on making my life far more difficult than it needs to be, the Universe sent me another message.
A nice woman named Jen reached out to comment on my blog post. Curious, I checked out her website and discovered her kindred mission: helping women recognize their own unique beauty. Pretty cool, hunh?! While I was browsing I discovered this:
A freaking theme song for those of us who feel we should be doing better than we are.
So, yah, there’s a lot of things I should be doing, and sometimes they don’t get done. But what I know for sure is that I need to switch up the way I start my day. Instead of asking myself what I did wrong the day before, I will ask myself this:
How can I appreciate even more God’s grace and acceptance in my life.
Maybe you’d like to start your day the same way.
